Ever heard that saying that giving itself is a gift? Well, it definitely applies to oral sex. Oral can be just as fun for the giver as it is for the receiver, especially if you experiment with brand-new moves that both of you will love. Here are some techniques that’ll take oral up a notch for your partner and make it more exciting for you as well.
Play with the backdoorOral isn’t all about the genitals. For both men and women, the area around the anus is filled with plenty of tiny nerve endings that feel wonderful when stimulated with the hands or tongue, says Laura Berman, Ph.D., sex and relationship therapist. Just make sure you discuss this with your partner first so there are no surprises. Showering together as foreplay might help you both feel clean and comfortable.
Make some noise
Making noise during sex isn’t just about the sound effect—noises like humming, moans, and groans “create a stimulating vibration,” says Jonathan Alpert, a psychotherapist and relationship expert. They also convey enthusiasm, which will make the experience more fun for both of you.
Tease them with kisses
To build anticipation, plant little kisses on your partner’s inner thighs and pubic mound, suggests Jess O’Reilly, Ph.D., Astroglide’s resident sexologist. “Simply hover over them and allow gentle kisses to emanate from your lips as you awaken their nerve endings and draw awareness and circulation to the area,” she says. “You can also use breath kisses over the entire body to build arousal and encourage full body orgasms.”
Your hands and mouth combined will provide even more pleasure than your mouth alone. If your partner has a vulva, O’Reilly recommends sliding your hands over the clitoris or inner lips. “Run your tongue up and down in the middle (between the inner lips) in the opposite direction,” she says. “Pay extra attention to the fourchette (the notch at the bottom where the lips meet) and the clitoral head with the tip of your tongue.” If your partner has a penis, use your hands to grip the base of the shaft while teasing the tip with your tongue.
Have your partner touch you
Oral sex shouldn’t be all about your partner. Sex writer Emily Morse suggests encouraging your partner to touch your breasts, nipples, and clitoris while you’re pleasuring them. Turning you on will turn them on, too.
Massage the prostate
For male partners, the prostate—located just in front of the rectum, it’s a gland about the size and shape of a walnut—is often an under-explored source of pleasure. “Discover and stimulate his prostate, a highly orgasmic area, while you lick, kiss, and tease the shaft,” suggests Berman. “Once you find it, massage it gently, then gradually up the intensity of your strokes and pressure,” she says.
Many people like the feeling of grinding against something, and your nose can come in handy for that, says O’Reilly. “Press it in and out, side to side, up and down, and all around,” she suggests. “The tips of your nose has a cool texture (feel it now!), so take advantage of its angles and contours as your partner rides your face.”
Use your entire body
Even your hair will feel good against your partner’s belly or pubic bone, says Alpert. Try massaging their thighs with your hands and rubbing your body on them. You can even run your fingernails down their back. You don’t have to emulate the “fast, furious, and hard” technique you’ve seen in porn, Alpert adds. Go slow and tease your partner before getting your mouth involved.